accurate depiction of past occurrences

somehow conveys both the past and present. i still believe time makes it fine.i know from my experience. and that's all i REALLY have. MY OWN experience, and no one else's. how often are we just standing on the ledge alone, thinking that that other person was standing next to us, only to realize they were never there.

but it's never really a 'realization' right? because it's their experience. it's just the one you didn't really consider. the thing that you cannot share with everyone.

how about anyone? maybe we just like to think so.

this is fun for me

WOOOOAAAH!!!
the weeknd might just represent to me the continued decay of american morality. his lyrical content specifically. but i think he's just a lot more overt than i'd prefer.



siouxsie and the banshees might've just been better at using metaphors.

reaching towards perfection

I wish I wasn't such a procrastinator. I wonder what my problem is. I think it's because I have such a hard time getting started, then the pressure kicks in and I have no choice but to start. I end up loosing all that prevented me from starting anyway: the need for perfection. I want my concept to be amazing, because I know that I have the potential for it to be that way. However, it never gets executed like that..........because anything close to perfection takes time. More time than I give myself. If I can wrap my academic being around this, to the point I don't have to remind myself of this fact, and I can get it to be automatic (the fact that I must start earlier no matter what) then the results will only get better over time. I cannot be perfect, so shouldn't let the fear of not being so prevent me from at least doing the best I can. It is the only way I can get better. Doing my best every single time. My dreams are huge, and they can be done, but only if I stop letting my own bad qualities hold me back.

I want to shine so badly, but I don't even deserve it if i don't do what I need to.

I hope putting this down will bring some subconscious clarity, and it can click.